To the woman who keeps leaving a pile of toilet paper next to the toilet in the woman’s bathroom. Stop it! It is not that difficult to get the toilet paper from the roll and hold onto it until you use it. If you drop some, then pick it up. The germs on the bathroom floor are not going to kill you in the 30 seconds it takes to exit the stall and wash your hands. (I really want to write a passive-aggressive note about this, but I fear that it will end up on this site.)
Also, putting a new roll of toilet paper onto the roll holder is not rocket science. I refuse to believe I am the only woman in this office capable of accomplishing this task.
To the client whose URL mysteriously generated a %20 in the middle of it. This is called URL encoding. %20 is the symbol for a space. This fact I have explained to you twice now. The URL you are copying and pasting into our application obviously has a space in it. How about you manually remove the %20 and stop copying and pasting the erroneous URL into the system and then complaining that my application is causing the error.
Also the correct response to my email saying I have manually removed the %20 from this URL is not ‘Oh cool, the system must have updated this whilst we slept” especially when your last email complaining about the error was at 10am and my email was sent at 10:30am. At what point between 10am and 10:30am did we sleep?
To the people on the bus. If there are no seats please move down to the end of the bus. Don’t stop at the centre doors, there is a whole other half of the bus that you can stand. Stopping at the centre doors means that people who need to get on can’t.
Also if a seat does become available and you have offered it to everyone around you but they have all declined, then just sit the fuck down. No one thinks big of you if you just stand there and look at the seat. If you sit down, then one extra person will be able to get on the bus and get home at a decent time.
To the asshole who almost ran me over by rolling his car forward whilst I was crossing at the lights: Fuck You!