What the??

This is the headline that jumped out at me from the Sydney Morning Herald today. Diplomat unadopts ‘difficult’ girl. What the fuck?

As you read through the article you learn that this little girl was adopted as a baby when the diplomat and his wife thought that they couldn’t have children. As it sometimes happens, the diplomat and his wife were able to have their own biological children sometime after the adoption. Now with their own kids and seven years after the adoption, they suddenly decide to abandon their first daughter because ” (it) was difficult to raise her because of cultural shock (and) she’s not willing to eat their food.” This makes absolutely no sense. They have been the parents of this girl since she was a baby – at most she would have been one when she joined their family. What food would have this kid been used to at age one that she could not change over to “their food”?

I didn’t even think that you could ‘unadopt’ a child. Once you adopt a child, that kid is yours both legally and emotionally. It would be like surrendering your parental rights to your children because they refused to eat their dinner. What parent would do that? Now, I know most parents have probably thought of disowning their ungrateful non-dinner eating brats, but seriously, who would go through with it??

I also don’t get what is so special about biological children when compared to adoptive children. If you are a man, it is five seconds of pleasure and if you are a woman it is nine months of pure hell, but what is that compared to years of love? What did you have a more active part in creating; the kid’s eye colour or their memories? I can tell you which one was more enjoyable and it has nothing to do with DNA.

I feel so sorry for this little girl. The only family she has ever know has just abandoned her in a country where she does not have citizenship. It is just downright cruel. People like her former adoptive parents do not deserve her or any other child.


9 responses to “What the??

  1. Are you for real? That is one of the most horrible things that I have ever, ever heard. So much of society is sad today.


  2. That is absolutely disgusting!! grrr that poor child. Makes your heart bleed. :S

  3. Whisperedsweet and Bettina – You are both right. It is a horrible situation and unfortunately that kind of attitude seems to be increasing in our society.

  4. That is horrendous. Truly heart breaking. How can they be so callous? makes you wonder if the poor thing is better off.

    I didn’t read the article. I am too upset by just your post to read any further.

  5. I’m adopted. I know who my real parents are.

    This story just breaks my heart.

  6. You’re right, that kind of attitude is becoming more prevelent in our society. I think it’s because children are increasingly seen as possessions, accessories and convieniences instead of the precious gifts from God that they are.

  7. this post just killed me. i was adopted & could not imagine the horror of this. deep down inside, when i was older & truly understood what adoption meant, i would have moments of wondering if i was “ok”…i cannot even imagine what this experience has done to this precious girl.

    now i will go hug my one children….

  8. My partner, born in UK, was adopted as a baby by an Australian couple who were working over there at the time, and brought to Australia when he was three, with a girl they adopted too.

    A couple of years later (mid 1960’s) they adopted two more children, brother and sister. The little girl got sent back to the children’s home after a few months. The boy stayed with them 2 or 3 years They decided they did not want him either and back he went too, to be fostered out to many different places.

    My partner’s mother was too interested in her role as the perfect hostess for her husbands high flying business contacts. I think she would have sent him back too if he had not been adopted in UK, although his reaction was to escape into books from an early age so was not so much ‘trouble’ as the others. His sister was her favorite and she made this very obvious, even cutting him out of her will.

    I cannot help feeling sad whenever I think of this. I think books were his salvation. He is a wonderfully caring man and father.

  9. Sueblimely – My heart goes out to your partner. What a horrible environment to grow up in. I am so glad that he got out of it relatively unscathed and is able to be such a wonderful father to his kids.